Friday, May 31, 2019

an amazing woman


Becoming is the June Book Club selection, I'm happy to report. I've
been wanting to read this but I'm still in my "let's escape" phase and
even though Michelle Obama is brilliant and inspirational, I had put
her on my To Do List. Mistake. One can easily get happily lost in
this terrific book as I am now.

Thursday, May 30, 2019

wild life



Here is my piece for Tiapos Writing Group last night ~

FAT FRANK VS. THE TINY GIRL

Back in January of this year I wrote about the mouse in the kitchen at the 
SPCA where I prepare food for the dogs every Monday morning. I made a
concerted effort to change my thinking and to become more accepting of
all of gods’ creatures. It was embarrassing to jump and squeal and prove
that I was a product of conditioning and of my narrow middle class upbringing 
in Pasadena,California. Home of the Rose Parade.

But I would complain to the staff and they would smile and say that only
last week one of the volunteers took two of the mice home. They pointed
out the “humane” traps and I pointed out the mouse droppings. Then Frank
would come out and stare at me when we were alone together. 

“If we don’t kill it, we name it.” 
“Why can’t we do both?”
“We are a no-kill facility.”
“His name is Frank and he now has a family.”

So every Monday morning I turn on the lights in the kitchen and prepare
to face Frank and his kin. I try not to look at the floor, I avoid listening for
skittering sounds. One morning I actually heard little squeaks, and not from 
me. My screams are loud and contain basic curse words.

Last Monday Anna the Opener bounced into the kitchen as I was starting to
open dog food cans. The door was already ajar and the lights were turned on 
when I arrived.

“Did Tiny do her job?”
“Who is Tiny?”
“Tiny Cat. She spent the night in here.”

I looked around. NO mouse droppings. No more do-nothing humane traps and
best of all, no Frank for the entire morning. Later I saw the cat box and the
sign warning people that Tiny Cat was locked in the kitchen all night and beware 
when opening the door. 

We can depend on nature and god knows the SPCA has lots of feline inventory
in case Tiny Cat goes to her forever home. Her resume is looking great.






Wednesday, May 29, 2019

a first and a last

high atop the hill

beautiful grounds

not as fun as the musical

It's rare for non-believers to be allowed to tour the innards of a Mormon
Temple, but yesterday Marsha arranged it with free tickets and our open
minds. That part wasn't true, but to walk around inside this vast space
with huge crystal chandeliers, bad art and cool baptism rooms was an
education indeed. This temple sits atop a hill in Oakland and can be
seen from all over the East Bay. We couldn't take photos inside, alas,
but it was a memorable visit indeed.


Tuesday, May 28, 2019

back to the tortured poet


Sunday night Neti and I went to the Marsh to see Who Killed Sylvia Plath
written by Lynne Kaufman and beautifully acted by Lorri Holt. It was
more than thirty years ago when Bill and I discovered Ms. Holt up in
Ashland and we have been fans ever since. She lives in the Bay Area and
in fact she used to come to Borders when I worked there. I do recommend
this excellent one act play and it was good to salute Sylvia once again.

Monday, May 27, 2019

memories on Memorial Day


This wasn't one of Bill's favorite hats and god knows he had a lot of
them. I bought this for him out at the VA and he wore it just to please
me (I think) last year for Memorial Day when he was in rehab out
at the Jewish Home Hospital. Even though he seldom spoke of his
service in the Navy it was a major part of his life and he did often
speak of the friends he made and now I find photos of the women he
wooed when he was so handsome in his uniform wearing that sly
smile that he became famous for. May I share that I miss him?

Sunday, May 26, 2019

Saturday with food and friends

#33 with egg, please

Suzy, her friend, Fuzzy in artsy store on 21st Street

Mussels for me, oysters for Fuzz, Suzy shared

A lovely day indeed. First I met Dancing Jen for lunch and then Suzy
and Fuzz and this young woman merchant who lives in Mexico City
and is a friend of a friend of Suzy's. Lots of walking too so my knees
are barking a bit now as I sit in front of the fireplace. I had walked
past the Oyster Bar on Mission many times, but dinner here last
night was excellent. And fun because the basketball game was on
and there was a lot of whooping and yelping in the background.

Saturday, May 25, 2019

here we go again


To my sorrow I was forced to resurrect this pin from the bottom of
my jewelry box. Women will abort no matter what, let's make it
safe for everyone, not just the wealthy women who have always had
the best medical care when they take control of their bodies.

Friday, May 24, 2019

at least it didn't rain


Ginger and I stayed until the 12th inning and then we knew we would lose.
Oh, how those Giants have perfected the Art of Striking Out. Still nice to
be back at the Jewel to eat the wrong foods and to curse the Braves.

Thursday, May 23, 2019

just enough funky



Yesterday the Book Club met for lunch at the Panama Hotel in
San Rafael. Outdoors, hooray! How have I never heard of this
place? It is a delightful restaurant and we had a fine time discussing
Bad Blood and preparing for Becoming for next month's gathering.

Wednesday, May 22, 2019

off to Ireland


My friend Hoan in Santa Barbara recommended this novel and
I am liking it a lot. Normal People tells the stories of those who
aren't, but who is? A good Kindle kind of read, especially for
those of us who appreciate anything Irish.

Tuesday, May 21, 2019

garden delights

Barb

Doug

Annabelle

Good timing, Stein. Yesterday I texted Doug and Barb that maybe I could
come over and retrieve my dishes from the post Passover dinner. It was
lunch time, how nice. They fed me and then we toured their garden which
is so lush and glorious after all our rain. Barb cut me some flowers and
we can see that my girl cat was delighted when I returned home.

Monday, May 20, 2019

three x three


Joe, Pamela and I get together to celebrate each others' birthdays and
yesterday it was all about Pamela. We went once again to Zut on 4th Street
in Berkeley. We dodged rain drops but the drive was mostly easy and
we had a delightful time together laughing and chatting madly.

Sunday, May 19, 2019

post Passover full moon celebration




There were twelve of us last night and lots of laughter, of course. I
missed my partner, but I survived and enjoyed myself. The celebration
was later than usual because Doug recently lost his mother and was
still grieving back in April. Delicious food, too, as always. We
weren't allowed to discuss the basketball game, but I checked the
score and kept quiet. We won. Marsha was my date last night and
she always impresses everyone. Doug truncated the ceremony and
Bill would have appreciated that.

Saturday, May 18, 2019

bouquets to retirement


Ask me (or any retail museum worker) how god awful it was to work
the deYoung Bouquets to Art event. Trust me here, almost as bad as
a bookstore the week before Xmas. Pure agony. There's just something
about crowds and greed that settles deep into the soul and never really
goes away. (My, this quiet fireplace with cat and computer feels so
perfect this morning.)

Friday, May 17, 2019

Peter Paul Rubens

the lion cave

front lawn of the Legion of Honor

I took myself out to the Legion of Honor yesterday afternoon, between
rain storms. Some huge paintings by this genius artist and I liked the
Lions (above) best. Rubens painted in the 1600's and that in itself is
something to appreciate. Yes, I recommend this visit with a coffee in
the cafe after gazing at saints and angels for an hour or so.

Thursday, May 16, 2019

three strong women

before


after

Another little splurge to make sure that my surroundings are the best they
can be. SF Garden Design descended on my tiny weed-covered backyard
yesterday and filled five giant bags with branches, weeds, and god knows
whatelse. I decided to leave the moss on the cement down there even
though Bill would scrape it off every spring. Sami the head gardener
said it would come off naturally in summer. A good day for me.

Wednesday, May 15, 2019

some shoe art, perhaps?


These shoes are a new addition to the alley next to Community Thrift
on Valencia. Our favorite thrift store has a chic new CTS sign. Oh,
please. But I was able to purchase a few cool accents for the new
kitchen. It needs color, CTS provides color. Plus a good walk for
this woman and then a latte with my LindaKindle4.

Tuesday, May 14, 2019

the cosmic melancholy of my past

like a seagull tethered to Alcatraz

VISITING SAN FRANCISCO

I wanted to curl up
in the comfortable cosmic melancholy of my past,
in the sadness of my past being passed.
I wanted to tour the museum of my antiquities
and look at the sarcophagi there.
I wanted to wallow like a water buffalo in the cool,
sagacious mud of my past,
so I wrote you and said I’d be in town and could we meet.
But you think my past is your present.
You wouldn’t relent, you wouldn’t agree
to dinner or a cup of coffee or even a bag of peanuts
on a bench in North Beach.
You didn’t want to curl up or tour or wallow with me.
You’re still mad, long after the days
have turned into decades, about the ways I let you down.
The four hundred thousand ways.
Maybe I would be, too.
But people have done worse to me.
I don’t think I’m being grotesque when I tell you
I’ve been flayed and slayed and force-fed anguish.
I’ve been a human cataract
plunging through a noose and going to pieces on the rocks.
I’ve been a seagull tethered to Alcatraz.
What can I say, what more can I say, how much more
vulnerable can I be, to persuade you
now that I’ve persuaded myself?
Why can’t you just let it go?
Well, at least I’m in San Francisco.
San Francisco, where the homeless are most at home—
crouching over their tucker bags under your pollarded trees—
because your beauty is as free to them
as to the domiciled in their
dead-bolt domiciles, your beauty is as free to
the innocent as to the guilty.
The fog has burned off.
In a cheap and windy room on Russian Hill
a man on the run unwraps the bandages
swaddling his new face, his reconstructed face,
and looks in the mirror and sees
the face of Humphrey Bogart. Only here
could such a thing happen.
It was really always you, San Francisco,
time won’t ever darken my love for you,
San Francisco.

~ Vijay Sephardi

This article appears in the print edition of the May 13, 2019, issue. NEW YORKER

Monday, May 13, 2019

oh, we so remember


Back when all my friends were getting married and no one even asked
me out on a date. Significant Other is a fabulous play and Neti and I
were in awe of the actors, especially Kyle Cameron who plays the
gay guy best friend. And I salute Joy Carlin the grandmother ~ these
days she makes so much sense in her role and we have seen her for
ages in assorted SF theaters. Beautiful set with dancing and laughter
and yes, tears. A huge thumbs up here, what a treat this was. See this!

Sunday, May 12, 2019

flowers and art in Bolinas



A Sally Robertson print to enhance and enchant

Yesterday Marsha (who is so good about driving) and I and the two dogs
went to an Open Studio Art and Garden event in Bolinas. Many memories
there too, but I was okay and we had a delightful day. Sally Robertson is
a well known water color artist who specializes in flowers and she has
a huge and varied garden including a small Monet-like pool with fish
and water lilies. I purchased a gift for my new kitchen and then we had
an early dinner at the Coast Cafe and all in all, a fine day. I sprinkled
some of Bill's ashes up there in a salute to our many visits over the years.

Saturday, May 11, 2019

three mile walk


I needed a change of scene after so much kitchen concentration these
past few days so off I went to Lake Merced. I hadn't been out here since
Bill died and it used to be one of our favorite places so I always allow
some time for memories and Kleenex® when I return to our spots. This
was a fine idea and I reflected on how fortunate we were to have so
much time together in this city that we both loved so much. And HOW
ABOUT that basketball game last night? Annabelle is not used to me
talking to the TV in a somewhat loud manner ~ we won, as you know.
Get used to it, dear kitty.

Friday, May 10, 2019

counter culture

oh my

fake cat


real cat

Yes, three hefty men finished this project in about five hours. At first
it was such a mess that Annabelle and I hid in our offices downstairs.
I wondered what had I done? Then it all came together and we are
so very happy with the results, as you can see. The plumber comes
this afternoon to turn the water in the kitchen back on and to
install the disposal. I am feeling a bit smug, to tell the truth.

Thursday, May 09, 2019

counter revolution

we are ready

old sink begone

this 400 year old cutting board was a bad decision

When the plumber arrived yesterday he had to replace some under sink
pipes before he turned off the water for the installers who arrive this
morning. He will return tomorrow afternoon to hook up the new disposal
and turn the water back on. Annabelle and I are using paper plates and
plastic utensils and trying not to think about how much this small job
is costing. Thanks to the Blogmaid who dropped in to encourage me
yesterday while I was studying jars and bottles and deciding whether to
toss or save them. My Bill loved a bargain and would buy accordingly.
How many anise seeds does one kitchen need?

Wednesday, May 08, 2019

what every woman needs


I knew I would like this BBC series from the very first scene. I had
heard and read about Killing Eve but I couldn't get it on Amazon
Prime or Netflix so I signed up for Hulu. Not my favorite, to be sure,
because the cheapest $5.99 per month includes (grrrrr) advertisements.
So far (two episodes) it takes place all over Europe because Eve is a
spy based in London. Even the assorted killings include strange
humor and Eve is a total delight as a character.


Tuesday, May 07, 2019

two poems about aging

Yes, I'm still going through stacks of papers and tossing a lot of stuff.
More love notes from Husbando and a lot of poetry that I had stashed
in strange places. I do a little clean-up at a time, saving goodies like this.

How To Be Old 

It is easy to be young, (Everybody is,
at first.) It is not easy
to be old. It takes time.
Youth is given; age is achieved.
One must work a magic to mix with time
in order to become old.

Youth is given. One must put it away
like a doll in a closet,
take it out and play with it only 
on holidays. One must have many dresses
and dress the doll impeccably
(but not to show the doll, to keep it hidden.)

It is necessary to adore the doll,
to remember it in the dark on the ordinary
days, and every day congratulate
one's aging face in the mirror.

In time one will be very old.
In time, one's life will be accomplished.
And in time, in time, the doll–
like new, though ancient–will be found.

~ May Swenson

I wrote this one back in the early 70's when I was
newly married ~ working at the Emporium as a
copywriter. The days before the iPhone, and yet...

TO THE LITTLE OLD LADIES AT
THE EMPORIUM CAFE COUNTER

You're alone
at the counter
twisting your wedding ring
and staring into space.
You bundle up 
against the world
and order the same thing
every day
is the same
at the counter.
You're gentle,
you're brave and
I cry for you
at the counter.

~ Mary Ann Stein 

Monday, May 06, 2019

art on the bay

Janet (artist) and Marsha (friend) and dogs


The Mueller report is out in paperback!

Beauty on the Bay

Marsha and I spent a few lovely hours at the old Hunters Point Shipyard which
houses hundreds of artists in converted barracks. The public is invited in
during Open Studio weekends and it is always a pleasure to wander around
talking to the artists and appreciating their work. Then we went down to
the Candlestick Recreational Park for fresh air and exercise with the doggies.

Sunday, May 05, 2019

the river of life

I had the short ribs

How could I resist?

The subject line is from my friend Hoan in Santa Barbara in an email
yesterday. She says that Bill would want me to step back in this river and
she is right. I had a l-o-n-g Happy Hermit walk yesterday out on Taraval
Street where the sun was trying to shine. I stopped for a late lunch at
Vanida, remembering Linda who now lives in Albuquerque. It used to
be "our place" and I miss her. Then I happened upon a garage sale and
bought this sleek glass rabbit for $5 ~ this means for sure that I will
host Easter again next year and this glass guy will grace our table.

Saturday, May 04, 2019

for the May book club


This reads like a novel. Bad Blood is the true story of Theranos and its
founder, Elizabeth Holmes. She raised billions of dollars and conned
the best and the brightest along the way. No one expected a lie this
big it seems. Ms. Holmes now lives in SF jogging around here as
she awaits trial.

Friday, May 03, 2019

my full Thursday

Day

Night

Lunch with Jen and her nephew Stephen yesterday at Noeteca, one
of our favorite spots from the past. Very European. Then an art
show out on Sacramento Street which I forced myself to attend.
This little house with soft lap cat pulls on my ankles and yet I'm
always glad when I get out and about. Still learning...