using the Widow Card

The widow grapevine told me that turning in Husbando's phone would not
be easy. I have been a Verizon customer for almost 22 years. When Dancing
Jen and I were in Paris, Bill would visit Verizon almost every other day
for phone help. They were always very nice. Yesterday the sales associate
told me I had to do this online so I used the tears and played the Widow Card.
Two lovely young people helped me and it was not easy for them what with
the holds, the need for passwords, the "turn in the phone at another Verizon
store" (!) and then trying to charge me. One brought me a cup of cold
water as they performed their magic with corporate. My gratitude for
Friday goes to them and to Husbando who was beside me throughout.

memories

Our friend Linda D. introduced us to the whole world of sea glass and the
many collectors and displays. My mind these grief-filled days and nights
is not so different ~ colors, sharp edges, many different pieces and none
making much sense right now. A few "don't go there!" and some just too
beautiful to touch. The Blogmaid is in Barcelona and I have a diary of
our trip there but I know it would burn my fingers if I even found the
damn thing.  Wide streets, glorious trees, tapas, sunshine and that nut
case Gaudi who probably loved sea glass. Know that I am okay.

an old friend guides me

I follow this list she sent me. And she writes too, sometimes at 4am
to let me know that I am not alone. We hadn't seen each other for
about 10 years and had lunch while Husbando was at the VA hospital.
One GREAT suggestion helped me at once. I moved into HIS
spot at the kitchen table. Ha, it is the best place with easy access and
great lighting. I immediately felt his strength and my power and
yes, I did become THE BOSS. My friend lost her partner of many
years and has been through the mill.  Carlini asks that I include one
gratitude nugget when I compile THE BLUR file everyday. Done.

the blur

Husbando's favorite cap and sure to draw comments from strangers.
I am taking notes on these post-death days so I can help others in
the future. I call the file THE BLUR because I am all scrambled
inside and out. This house which often was too small for us seems
huge. I slept in his old 2000 ugly grey tee last night. I don't sleep
of course. I talk to him non-stop. I want to erase the last few hours
before he transitioned (nurse talk) and what would I have done
without Ginger and the Blogmaid? I reach out and call friends and
they come over to drink tea or coffee with me ~ I am grateful and
then ask them to leave. They all understand. Carlini calls from
Colorado and tells me I am fine. I am and I know that. I do two
tasks a day ~ today the cremation papers and maybe call Social
Security. Everything and nothing.

leave of absence

I will be taking some time off because dear Husbando is
reaching his Journey's End as the hospice literature states.
Age and a very bad heart take their toll. He still has a
very big heart, but like his body, it is just plain wore out.
I will write again at some point. Know that our friends are
embracing us with love, soup, kindness, chocolate and just
being here with us. Nurse/reverend Carlini is our guide these
days and what would we do without him?

report from Bisbee, AZ

Folks around here are marveling at how quiet it is here at the Border in Southeast 

Arizona.   Both crossings - Douglas and Naco are quiet  - with people coming and 

going and business as usual. (No national guards have been spotted) Tuesday I 

went to Aqua Prieta to get my eyes checked; and had a conversation with my 

doc's assistant about "Manifest Destiny" (he brought it up).  Thought it explained 

a lot about the American government's attitude.

Yesterday my dental hygienist - who is Mexican American - marveled at how 

heartless the Trump administration is - and with the blessing of some many 

people - none of whom we know.  We saw the CNN interview with the 

horrid old people in Mesa, Arizona and  decided that Mesa is one place 

you don't want to go -- not even to stop for gas. She told me about growing 

up here before 9/11 and how everybody just walked back and forth across 

the border, shopping and visiting.   Then the Feds came and built the fences 

and everybody had to get a Border pass card to go back and forth.  All of it 

irrelevant to life down here -- and a big inconvenience.  A couple of weekends 

ago, there was a communal Border concert in Douglas and Aqua Prieta - 

singing and dancing and sharing food through the fence.  (My next door neighbor 

did her fire dancing as part of the celebration)  Of course it got no news coverage 

whatsoever...…

Meanwhile we are heartsick at the plight of all the refugee children and parents - who are considered an "infestation" by our president.

Now I'm going out to fill my bird feeders and water my garden.  

pitcher for sale

Meet Hunter Strickland, hot head. After losing a game for our Giants
on Monday night he rammed his fist into a wall breaking his pinky
finger and proving once again that anger should be channeled. Jerk.

it's more

I just started Less by Andrew Sean Greer who is one of our favorite
authors and a local guy too. Wonderful writing, of course. Try it!

sometimes it is just too much

Here, from a friend on Facebook:

We're living in a country that is building concentration camps for children
 and that is presided over by a leader who admires murderous dictators, 
demands obedience and wants to dominate space and his cronies who 
are starting to openly equate morality with adherence to the law. At this 
point I'm no longer treating the idea of an American fascist state as a 
hypothetical.

Frank loved all trees

Frank at work for FUF

81 new trees with this sticker

 Friends of the Urban Forest gathered yesterday out on 25h Avenue to honor
our Frank who gave so much time and money to the trees of SF. When we
would mention an address (say of a friend or maybe a restaurant) Frank
knew exactly which trees were out in front. Many he had planted and taken
care of over the years. Frank was an arborist and an all-around fine man.
FUF had a huge volunteer force yesterday morning and they were going
to plant 81 trees out in the Avenues. All with the lovely Frank sticker.
It was a special morning for Frank's huge fan club ~ and sunshine too!

variety in Pumpkinville

All spotted on Kelly Avenue, about a block from the ocean in Half
Moon Bay on my early Thursday walk. Excellence.

RR graduates!

I had a delightful time at the 8th grade Seacrest Graduation Ceremony on
Wednesday night in Pumpkinville. So very nice of the family to include
me and here you see the beautiful RR who was the star of this whole
production. I spent the night down there and that was so good for ME
and I will share photos with you next time we meet. Like tomorrow.

Pumpkinville

Morning latte at the Half Moon Bay Coffee Company - congratulations to Ryan
who graduated yesterday. Onward to Mercy...yes! Graduation details tomorrow.

harvesting a discount

Armed with my Eaze physician's statement (all done online, piece of cake)
I hit Harvest on 26th Street yesterday for sleep aids. The small, clean,
well-organized store was packed with grey haired customers and a staff
of seven or eight knowledgable men and women. With my senior
discount the GummiCares came to $23.40 and we didn't even need
them last night, but nice to know they are here.

we like the gritty

Anthony Bourdain loved SF and appreciated the fact that we have always
been a dirty city. I have a friend who complains about the mess and longs
for a pristine town. Too bad, we ain't. On Saturday, to mourn for Chef
Bourdain and a few others, I went to Cafe Sticky at 24th and Mission.
The Seahorse and I loved this place and I got a front row seat to watch
the locals stroll by. Same terse unfriendly service, same mean signs,
lots of tables needing a thorough wipe down. I left feeling cleansed.
Thank you, Frisco. Thank you Cafe La Boheme.

the lights of Broadway

We always enjoy the Tony Awards and my writing partner last week
lives in the heart of NYC and has seen many of the wonders that
were presented in part last night. My choice would be "The Band's
Visit" because that was such a great movie.

we love NYC dramas

Wealthy families are fun to study and here in Succession there are four
grown adult children, a stepmother and the head honcho who likes to
play games and who seems to make the children nastier than they already are.
We have only watched the first episode but we liked it a lot. HBO.

warriors win it all (again)

Last night's game was not very exciting, but the end result was extremely
satisfying as the Dubs get ready for their parade next week. Congratulations
to these fun basketball players and their coaches, fans, etc.

my morning write

I’m pissed and upset this morning about the suicide of Anthony Bourdain. He was only

61. I met him once at Borders and he was one of those famous authors who is actually

friendly and nice to the staff. Many aren’t because they are too important to talk to

us. He was gorgeous in that rumpled I-love-this-life sort of way. His wonderful book

“Kitchen Confidential” blew the lid off restaurant work and the people behind the

scenes. We all loved it. Did I mention that he was gorgeous?

Bill and I went to his first restaurant (Les Halles) in NYC once with the youngest

son Rob. For the past few years we have been watching Chef Bourdain in his

travels around the world on CNN. How could a man who seemed to enjoy life

so much kill himself? Not only food, he seemed to appreciate the common

people, the street vendors, the cooks and waiters. He hate horrible local things

so he wouldn’t appear to be an outsider. He drank, he smoked.

Kate Spade, Anthony Bourdain. Two suicides of famous people in one week.

Both by hanging. Stop this madness.

We all mourn today.

oh, what a day

Well, this lovely photo was snapped when I first arrived and honestly,
it felt like I was in some sort of quiet church. I stared and contemplated
about baseball and life. Both so surprising. For instance yesterday the
Giants bats were f-l-a-t and we were sure they would cough it up.
Ginger and I left knowing we would lose. 9th inning they tie it up,
10th inning we WIN. Like I was saying...baseball = life.

first karn

Husbando grew up in St. Louis and for some reason he always pronounced
corn as karn. After correcting him for a decade or so I now say it his way.
We only like yellow karn and yesterday I found these ears at Whole
Foods and yes, they were beyond delicious.

shoe biz

I am not walking up the wall. These are Brooks® and very, very
comfortable. I also purchased a pair of Nike® black shoes for
my dress-up days. My favorite shoe shoppe is the Sports Basement
on Bryant Street and I do not even mind paying full price since
I buy shoes every three years or so. The pair pictured above remind
me of Linda D. and her joy of color.

weeds in the nabe

Growing right out of the concrete in an over-busy, too crowded city ~ behold
nature asserting herself. "I'M STILL HERE." This is very close to our
home, Florida and Peralta...I sill get all these strange little blocks confused.
But beautiful.

two housewives

Yesterday the Blogmaid drove up from Pumpkinville and we shopped
our little hearts out at this Trader Joe's on Bryant Street in SF. Then
we had Peet's latte rewards with some candy and talked about life.
It was such a pleasant time for me and I wish to express my gratitude
to her this morning on this blog that everyone reads. Gracias, Amiga!

the flour baby

this was forwarded from a friend ~ such a GREAT project for
young people, don't you think?

Hello all,

Congratulations! In a few days you will become grandparents!! 

The 8th grade flour baby project will be starting on June 2nd and ending on June 8th. 
Attached is the project. The students will be receiving their flour bags on Friday 
June 1st during class. They are allowed to put one layer of duct tape around their 
flour bag. I highly recommend this. This prevents the bag from breaking and will 
help your child's grade. Each student has to turn in their flour baby at the end of 
the project for an overall health check.

I will also be sending out a late night feeding schedule on Friday June 1st. Every 
student will have to call me to say "the feeding has begun" and 15 minutes later 
saying "the feeding has ended".

All flour babies must have at least a blanket. If your child decides to dress their 
flour baby, that is fine but not required.

Teachers will be given CPS(Child Protective Services) forms. Hopefully, no 
teacher will have to use these. Treat these flour bags like babies. The purpose 
of this project is to educate the 8th grade on how much responsibility having a 
baby is. This is a prevention project.

Thank you,
Coach XXXXXX

it's the truth

Not to get gushy here, but every day deserves my gratitude. Done.